too wierd to live, too rare to die: the bnew story, part one: growing up "new"

It was a sunny september morning on september 9th 1988 when I was placed on this earth. My parents, Christopher, a army sergeant from philadelphia who had spent the past two years in regan-era cold war west germany, and my mother, Kim, a college dropout who was originally from a small town in upstate New York. They had barley been married a year when I came into their lives, and for the past twenty, have been a big part of it. My dad was in the national guard and had also shown a intrest in the new technology in computers, and had enough insight to rase his son (and a year later daughter) on them. Growing up I played games like reader rabbit and putt-putt goes to the moon. However, I also stumbled across my dad's copies of doom and civilization, those games furthered my own intrest in technology and computers, and by the time I was four, I had a computer in my own room to play games on. In addition to my computer I also had a nintendo home system in our living room, mario played at an almost constant (I attribute growing up in front of screens to my comfort of playing hours and hours of video games and not feeling the slightest bit of dissapointment in myself over it.) Growing up I didn't have a brother per say, but I did have a cousin who I consider my older brother mostly cause we grew up almost our whole lives with eachother, quite often resulting in a lot of activities you'd expect from two brothers. My family is to this day a major factor in my life and is what shaped me into the person I am today.

I'll make my stand, right here with my friends

Friends are a funny concept, one that only we as humans create, a group of simmilar intrests that find a common ground that bonds them together. Some people are total opposites and still manage to be friends on some basis, but here in the military, not just the army, friends often become more than just that, they become brothers through experience that no one besides those who go through it will understand. Friends evolve into cliques and become second familes to each other, I know this because my friends are my second family, and being away from my friends back home has made me greatful for their love and willingness to spend time with me when I came home. (Arian, Ashlie, Becky, Jacob, Jess, Joe, Kerri, Lester, Trina, Tony, Zak) I'm sure when I come home again there will be the same people I see and more, friends are a special thing, but you must remember, its the quality of friends, not the quantity

and the horse you rode in on

What makes someone unique these days? Dying your hair tatoos and piercings have become mainstream these days so one almost has to go out of their way to wear a cardboard box while dancing and singing show tunes to feel like an "individual" however if people stopped and realized that people consider you unique for who you are and the things you do, not what you wear and what your appearence is, maybe we would stop worring about what our favorite actresses and actors wore on the red carpet or how underground you appear for dying your hair green and cutting it into a mohawk. Fuck that, its an image one puts up to show off to others, I like funny shirts and patterns, does that make me unique? No, far from it. Everyone likes to laugh. So maybe next time you think "I wanna put highlights in my hair to look like LC from laguna beach or wear makeup because it makes me look older. Take a look in the mirror and try to remember who you were, not who they are.

not with a bang but a wimper

All things considered, I'm the least accessable person in the world right now, not just because of the army but mentally also, I'm in a wierd place right now. I know what I want but as always, can't have it currently. I guess I'm just waiting for someone to come along and divert my attention. I can understand someone not wanting to be in a relationship with me at the moment, I'm never around, and I can only talk certan hours of the day, however, I'm only a phone call away. Geeesh is this boy puttin himself out there